When your day goes from bad to living hell…..that is how today is panning up for me. First thing this morning I am attacked by ex-husband, number deuce. Its two days now that he got the better of me. Seriously fighting is the furthest thing from my mind. I am mentally exhausted. I don’t like to show my emotions often to people but this last month has really knocked me down. I will be fine and hopefully get out of my ‘funk’ soon.
I may have said I don’t like to show my emotions but I did today. I am ashamed to say I was a cry baby. I really care how others view me. I want to be known as a nice and caring individual. Haven got called all the names that I did today really have taken its toll on me. My self confidence and my character has both went south. I think I seriously contemplated becoming a hermit today. How crazy is that? I think I am off my rocker. I so bad wanted to hear that I wasn’t worthless and that I meant something to someone. I know that I am a good person and I know that I mean something to people. It was just that exact moment in time that I needed to hear it from someone, anyone.
If I learned anything in nursing school it would be communication. People perceive non-verbal signs of communication much more than the actual spoken words. Hand gestures, tone, pitch, facial expressions, and just how interested the person is when they are talking are all taken into consideration. I learned today that sometimes no matter how much it hurts to just let go…that sometimes it is for the best.
I take what people say in consideration but I take their actions to heart. Which reminds me that old saying “actions speak louder than words” is nothing but the truth.
I know this post doesn’t make a lot of sense and it is not supposed to. I left out a huge chunk of why I feel the way I do. I don’t believe in airing dirty laundry and I would never put someone’s integrity in question for the world to see.
4 comments:
Hey, you are a good person and our conversations mean a lot to me! I always enjoy them. Keep your head up, things will get better.
Aww...I appreciate that. My head is up. Sometimes I just feel better writing whatever I feel at that specific moment. I was only down for a little while. :) I appreciate it much though.
I also enjoy our conversations! You are an amazing person.
u are a great person. i never met a women that is like u. i hate that u felt that way. people are lucky to haveu in there life. want ice cream tonight?
I am going to take a pass on the ice cream. Thank you though. Very sweet of you. :)
You must seriously have a false reality of me. Don't be putting me on a pedestal because you might give me a big head!
How is work though?
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