Just say no...

It has been a stressful day or two. I won't go into details but I will say I have been thinking heavily about being nice. I am told that I am too nice to the point that I get taken advantage of. To an extent I agree--I do get taken advantage of. I however love being nice. I love helping. I love being there for people.

I have decided that I need to come to a healthy balance---but getting there I have no idea!

I came from a very giving family. My mom would cook for the neighborhood at the tattoo shop. To the point that I grew up with all the neighborhood kids as they were brothers and sisters. We raised money for organizations, volunteered time, and was always there for anyone that needed someone. I carried on this way of life.

I have loaned money and never been paid back. I have given furniture to people who needed it more. I donate clothes to the children of Bridge of Hope. I wrap presents at Christmas times for children who wouldn't have anything else wise.

Now in no way does this make me better or do I think I am owed anything. I do every last bit of it because I love to help. I love the feeling of doing something "right" and "selfless".

In fact my "something" in a previous post has a lot to do with this topic.

Regardless, I love life. I love people. I try to find good in even the darkest heart. This is a trait that my mom, my sister, and I inherited. What is funny is I will tell my sister she is getting walked on or taken advantage of even though int he same situation I would have done the same.

I went in to health care after my mom passed away. I thought with a career in health care I would be able to touch the lives of others. I would make a difference. The sad thing is I don't work with people. I work at a desk doing a job I dislike. I do so because the hours provide me the most time to be home with my kids--my top priority.

The only thing this job has done for me was to gain forty pounds and to realize that I do not want to pursue a job in billing. I do not regret my decision on accepting this job--I am actually thankful that I had. Strange, I am sure. I learned some things from the job and I met some fantastic people who have become great friends of mine.

I got off topic there. Anyway, my life is and has always been about being nice. How do I come to that healthy balance of not being too nice? I think I am going to have to start by saying "no". I have great difficulty in saying that two letter word. I will now practice just saying no. I know I will not change overnight but hey I will get there.

Now, with my inability to say no, does not mean that I am weak. I am an independent person who is happy and really enjoys life. Respect and manners will get you far.

I will still enjoy helping people and I will still be nice.