Happy Halloween everyone!
The boys and I went trick-or-treating together and Tiana went with her friend. It truly made me realize how fast my kids are growing that she didn't even want to spend Halloween with me. I guess it was a realization that she is becoming much more independent. Isn't that how life goes?
The boys got loads of candy and they had a ton of fun. I seen some great decorated houses and some that actually put on a lil' haunted house or a haunted scene. That is what I want when my kids are 'too old' to trick-or-treat....a house to remember on Halloween.
Anyway, it was another long day--very long. I think I am going to try and take a day off soon and well--go out! Yup, I do think it is time for myself to go out and see what fun I can have. I actually have a three-day weekend off the weekend before my birthday so I am sure that I will be doing something 'adult-like' during that time.
Happy Halloween to all of you!
Friday, October 31, 2008
Thursday, October 30, 2008
Dressing up...
Tomorrow is Halloween and it is my all-time favorite holiday! Yes, I have purchased a costume and I plan on wearing it to work and possibly out trick-or-treating.
My co-workers know that I went costume shopping so they asked me if I was going to wear it to work tomorrow. I replied "My jugs look like watermelons when I tried it on". They laughed hysterically and one replied "I haven't heard someone use the word jugs to describe their boobs in a long time" to which another one replied "At least not a woman".
I guess I am different. My mouth seems to move faster than my brain. Well if you talk to me than you already know that.
I did decide that I am going to wear my costume to work and I am hopefully going to leave the house a bit early so I can pick up some Halloween candy for the clients. I think we might even get a few Trick-Or-Treaters!
As you can tell--I am slightly excited!
My co-workers know that I went costume shopping so they asked me if I was going to wear it to work tomorrow. I replied "My jugs look like watermelons when I tried it on". They laughed hysterically and one replied "I haven't heard someone use the word jugs to describe their boobs in a long time" to which another one replied "At least not a woman".
I guess I am different. My mouth seems to move faster than my brain. Well if you talk to me than you already know that.
I did decide that I am going to wear my costume to work and I am hopefully going to leave the house a bit early so I can pick up some Halloween candy for the clients. I think we might even get a few Trick-Or-Treaters!
As you can tell--I am slightly excited!
Sunday, October 19, 2008
Number 11?
The kids and I just returned home a couple of hours ago from our trip across the state. I must say it ended up being one of the best trips that I made back home.
It didn't start off that way, in fact I was almost on the verge to turn around and come back but I only had 7 miles to go to make my way into Sioux City. My feelings got hurt and I, to say the least, got emotional. OKay, I was a cry baby.
We visited my dad, who went above and beyond what a dad/grandpa needed to do for this trip. I received my graduation presents--which are gorgeous and very thoughtful.
My sister and my kids and I enjoyed a nice breakfast together. We also wandered around Menards looking for 8 inch duct piping that comes in 5 foot sections.
I got to spend a couple of hours at the tattoo shop, which I might need to add--the rumor was correct--someone has new ink.
I ate jalapeno jelly, habanero pepper salsa, and some pretty awful dill pickle. Thanks Steve, it was all delicious but the dill pickles! Ha Ha!
We made a trip to the Ole Time Candy Shop where I picked up some TWIN BINGS and lots of other sweets.
I actually visited my Grandma--no the world is not coming to an end!
I seen some old friends from years ago and the family that means so much to me. I was even asked if I was planning on moving back to start a career up there in the near future. I was reminded that I am single so that can't be 'holding' me in Ottumwa.
Now I am planning on going back 'home' for Christmas...
It didn't start off that way, in fact I was almost on the verge to turn around and come back but I only had 7 miles to go to make my way into Sioux City. My feelings got hurt and I, to say the least, got emotional. OKay, I was a cry baby.
We visited my dad, who went above and beyond what a dad/grandpa needed to do for this trip. I received my graduation presents--which are gorgeous and very thoughtful.
My sister and my kids and I enjoyed a nice breakfast together. We also wandered around Menards looking for 8 inch duct piping that comes in 5 foot sections.
I got to spend a couple of hours at the tattoo shop, which I might need to add--the rumor was correct--someone has new ink.
I ate jalapeno jelly, habanero pepper salsa, and some pretty awful dill pickle. Thanks Steve, it was all delicious but the dill pickles! Ha Ha!
We made a trip to the Ole Time Candy Shop where I picked up some TWIN BINGS and lots of other sweets.
I actually visited my Grandma--no the world is not coming to an end!
I seen some old friends from years ago and the family that means so much to me. I was even asked if I was planning on moving back to start a career up there in the near future. I was reminded that I am single so that can't be 'holding' me in Ottumwa.
Now I am planning on going back 'home' for Christmas...
Monday, October 13, 2008
October 13th, 2006
What were you doing two years ago today?
I can tell you exactly what I was doing. I was spending my last night as a Sioux City citizen. My moving van was packed and I stayed up most of the night nervously thinking to myself if I was making the right decision on moving 300 miles across the state. No doubt in my mind--I made the right choice.
Honestly I was scared out of my mind. I left my family behind, my friends, everything that I knew was in Sioux City.
I remember arriving here to Ottumwa and crying myself to sleep for weeks. I missed everyone but I kept telling myself that it was temporary--I will soon be back home.
I can remember going home over Christmas in 2006 and I remember the mind games my ex husband insisted on partaking in. At that moment I knew that my choice of moving 300 miles saved not only my sanity--but my life. I can remember having a conversation with my cousin in tears saying "I just want to go home" but the ironic thing was I was talking about Ottumwa. It was that moment that my family realized that I did exactly what I needed to do to make my life just that--my life.
This weekend I get to make the trip back 'home' to Sioux City. I am quite excited and looking forward to seeing all my friends and family. Of course the tattoo shop is on the top of my to do list--rumor is I might come home with some new ink...
I can tell you exactly what I was doing. I was spending my last night as a Sioux City citizen. My moving van was packed and I stayed up most of the night nervously thinking to myself if I was making the right decision on moving 300 miles across the state. No doubt in my mind--I made the right choice.
Honestly I was scared out of my mind. I left my family behind, my friends, everything that I knew was in Sioux City.
I remember arriving here to Ottumwa and crying myself to sleep for weeks. I missed everyone but I kept telling myself that it was temporary--I will soon be back home.
I can remember going home over Christmas in 2006 and I remember the mind games my ex husband insisted on partaking in. At that moment I knew that my choice of moving 300 miles saved not only my sanity--but my life. I can remember having a conversation with my cousin in tears saying "I just want to go home" but the ironic thing was I was talking about Ottumwa. It was that moment that my family realized that I did exactly what I needed to do to make my life just that--my life.
This weekend I get to make the trip back 'home' to Sioux City. I am quite excited and looking forward to seeing all my friends and family. Of course the tattoo shop is on the top of my to do list--rumor is I might come home with some new ink...
Saturday, October 11, 2008
I said it--and I mean it--I think.
After great deliberation I have decided that I am ready for a relationship—or to say the least—date.
I have taken my time to reflect on myself and made a few necessary changes to myself. I’m happy, to be honest though I have always been pretty happy with the way my life is.
I realize I want more in life now, that I don’t need a relationship with a man, but that I would enjoy one—with the right man. This does not mean that I will change any of my “good girl” morals and values just simply means that I want to fill the slight void that I have in my life—with the right man.
Now how to find the “right man”? Good question. I’m willing to figure that out.
I have taken my time to reflect on myself and made a few necessary changes to myself. I’m happy, to be honest though I have always been pretty happy with the way my life is.
I realize I want more in life now, that I don’t need a relationship with a man, but that I would enjoy one—with the right man. This does not mean that I will change any of my “good girl” morals and values just simply means that I want to fill the slight void that I have in my life—with the right man.
Now how to find the “right man”? Good question. I’m willing to figure that out.
Saturday, October 4, 2008
What is a mother to do?
This last week has tested my patience over and over…
First off I worked 50 hours and of course I am in school fulltime too. Now that is not what I am speaking about. My patience was tested beyond my normal obstacles.
On Tuesday I had to meet with a therapist for ‘mediation counseling’ with my second ex husband. At this time he was not there it was the initial appointment to explain what it is I am wanting. You see my ex husband hasn’t seen his kids in the last 5 visits he was scheduled, mind you these are alternating weekends. I have no problem with having my kids 365 days a year and that is an absolute promise. What my issue is that he doesn’t have the decency to call and say that he is not coming down. It puts me in a bind with daycare because I work on the weekends he is scheduled and not scheduled for that matter. But having to run around last minute to get that child care is stressful.
Now looking at it from another point of view through my kids’ eyes they miss their dad and are starting to get angry at him. My youngest confronted his dad over the phone and said “Dad I have the right to know are you coming down.” Saying this got him yelled at to the point of big crocodile tears streaming down his face. I took the phone away and stated to my ex husband that he will not talk to the kids that way and I hung up. Of course he called back and left me a great message, He hates me, I am worthless, I am a bitch, I am nothing, he is taking me back to court, and much ,much more. I can’t take these messages anymore. I moved across the state so I didn't have to.
Well with him not coming to see his kids and only talking to them twice since the last time he physically seen them has taken quite the toll on my kids. My middle son is acting out and my youngest is extra clingy. I started Ian into counseling this last Wednesday and she told me she is suspecting “ABUSE”! It just continues to echo inside my head.
This Monday I will be calling and getting an appointment for my youngest son to speak with a counselor by his request. Yup, my seven year old requested to speak to someone on the way that his dad talks to them.
Now this is very hard for me because I am trying to stay as neutral as possible. Meaning, I am not bad mouthing the kids’ dad to them. I figure they have enough anger to deal with of their own, they don’t need mine.
What is a mother to do…
First off I worked 50 hours and of course I am in school fulltime too. Now that is not what I am speaking about. My patience was tested beyond my normal obstacles.
On Tuesday I had to meet with a therapist for ‘mediation counseling’ with my second ex husband. At this time he was not there it was the initial appointment to explain what it is I am wanting. You see my ex husband hasn’t seen his kids in the last 5 visits he was scheduled, mind you these are alternating weekends. I have no problem with having my kids 365 days a year and that is an absolute promise. What my issue is that he doesn’t have the decency to call and say that he is not coming down. It puts me in a bind with daycare because I work on the weekends he is scheduled and not scheduled for that matter. But having to run around last minute to get that child care is stressful.
Now looking at it from another point of view through my kids’ eyes they miss their dad and are starting to get angry at him. My youngest confronted his dad over the phone and said “Dad I have the right to know are you coming down.” Saying this got him yelled at to the point of big crocodile tears streaming down his face. I took the phone away and stated to my ex husband that he will not talk to the kids that way and I hung up. Of course he called back and left me a great message, He hates me, I am worthless, I am a bitch, I am nothing, he is taking me back to court, and much ,much more. I can’t take these messages anymore. I moved across the state so I didn't have to.
Well with him not coming to see his kids and only talking to them twice since the last time he physically seen them has taken quite the toll on my kids. My middle son is acting out and my youngest is extra clingy. I started Ian into counseling this last Wednesday and she told me she is suspecting “ABUSE”! It just continues to echo inside my head.
This Monday I will be calling and getting an appointment for my youngest son to speak with a counselor by his request. Yup, my seven year old requested to speak to someone on the way that his dad talks to them.
Now this is very hard for me because I am trying to stay as neutral as possible. Meaning, I am not bad mouthing the kids’ dad to them. I figure they have enough anger to deal with of their own, they don’t need mine.
What is a mother to do…
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